Do not give up on the dream you have, Momma (and yes, you deserve that title). For you are a mother in your soul, down to the very bones of your body. You are a mother to the animals you care for daily, that rely on you for food and water, who come to you for love and attention. You are a mother to the children who come into your life, be they nieces or nephews, or children of dear friends, for you nurture and teach these children, as if they were your own. You are a mother to this earth, as you dig in the soil and plant in the ground, watch as your seeds sprout and your flowers bloom.
Do not give up on that one day babe you long for in your life. Do not put your dream aside. Love yourself and love that you are strong and that you are healing. Love that one day, you are going to be the best of mothers, because you have waited so long to love and cherish a child of your own.
Do not blame yourself. Do not hate your body. Although you may not get along right now, and it may not feel like it most days, your body is a temple and deserves to be treated as such. So do just that. Nourish your body. Eat your greens, don’t skip on the avocado, drink plenty of water, get your sleep, go for walks and if you want that bowl of icecream at the end of the day, do the damn thing and eat it! Because you deserve it.
But Momma, what you should do, is feel. Let whatever is happening in that moment take its course. Feel it, cry about it, yell about it, scream at the top of your lungs if that’s what you feel compelled to do in the moment. But do not hide those feelings, not for one minute. You don’t have to always pretend like everything is ok. It’s ok, to not be ok. You don’t always have to be strong. You don’t always have to be brave. You are allowed days when the best you do is get out of bed, go to work and come back home again to start it all again the next day. Feel what you need to feel, and then keep on going.
What you should do is surround yourself with a village. There will be those who will never leave your side, there will be those who stand silently by because they don’t understand your struggle, and there will be those who flee because you’re bravery makes them insecure. Do not let this change you. Do not let this change your path. Stand strong, beside those who love and care for you, and know that together, you will make it through all this.
It’s not going to be easy, I’d be lying if I said it was. But you can do this. Even on those days when it feels like you can’t, please do not forget why you are going through this battle, do not forget how far you have come on your journey. Don’t look back now. Keep your eye on the prize. One day, that babe will be yours. One day, you will hold that sweet little bundle in your arms, and you will tell them all about how you fought for them beause you knew life wouldn’t be complete without them.
So hang in there, babe.